You may think having a partner to share the New Year with is all you need to be happy in 2019, but being in a relationship isn’t easy. It requires a lot of work, healthy compromises, and understanding differences without judgment.

You may think your coupled friends are super-duper happy. After all, that’s certainly the impression they give at social gatherings, on Facebook, or in those holiday cards they send out every year that tell you all about their amazing job, their amazing vacations, and their amazing life.

Relationship experts, however, are quick to warn us that happy couples are almost never as happy as they seem.

Is the grass always greener? I know from personal experience, and from working with my clients, the answer most of the time is no. How many women really know how to be great pickers the first time around? Not many! The truth is most of us get fooled.

If you find yourself wishing you had a “plus one” on your arm this year, stop and remember that being single frees you to live authentically. You don’t have to fake your way through another holiday, family gathering, or work-related event, straining to keep a smile on your face while secretly wishing you could leave a miserable relationship behind you.

Yes, singles may feel lonely sometimes, but true loneliness is feeling alone in a marriage. Be grateful that your occasional feelings of loneliness stem from actually being alone, not from being stuck in the wrong relationship!

So many men and women settle, whether they fully realize it or not. They marry the wrong person because it seemed like the next logical step. Or because their biological clock was ticking. Or because everyone expected them to propose, so they did. Or because they were worried no one else would come along. And while it’s true that couples can (sometimes) make a mediocre marriage work, in the end do these lucky few ever feel like they’re truly loved? Probably not.

Great gifts are worth waiting for – being cherished by a man who says “I can’t believe I met you!” is something you truly deserve.  Remember that as you head into the New Year.  And, as always, if there’s anything I can do for you, please let me know!